by Cheyenne Schoen |
Scores of freshmen will make the pilgrimage home next week, some for their first time since coming to college. Family members crowded around the turkey may ask them questions about how they like their roommate, whether they still have those straight A’s they haven’t had since middle school and — the dreaded question — “Are you still going out with that date from the prom?”
The Turkey Drop is on the horizon, which means that potatoes aren’t the only ones getting mashed this Thanksgiving. This phenomenon happens around the holiday season when freshmen in long-distance relationships go home, only to dump or be dumped by their high school sweethearts.
Sophomore organizational communication and political science major Jacque Nelson broke up with her high school boyfriend, who was one year younger than her, during Thanksgiving break of her freshman year. She said that the dump was necessary for her growth in the college environment.
“Fall break you think everything’s fine, like, ‘This is great,’” Jacque said. “And then the next month rolls around and you’re like, ‘Oh, just kidding, that was just a temporary fix.’ So Thanksgiving rolled around and we broke up.”
Nelson attributed the breakup to changes she went through during her first semester, as well as the communication barrier between a high schooler and a college-aged student.
“You change so much in just that short amount of time here in college,” Nelson said. “I’m not even the same person I was when we first got together. It just didn’t make sense anymore.”
Dumpsgiving is prime time for a breakup if it’s going to happen. Waiting too long after that encroaches on Christmas territory. Breaking up before that New Year’s kiss? No way. Wait too long after that and you’ll hit the worst time to break up with someone, the holiday of love itself.
Sophomore theology major Niko Strom and his ex-girlfriend broke up after Thanksgiving break his freshman year.
He said that, in addition to conflicts within the relationship, the stress of finals and missing out on activities were major factors in the relationship’s failure. After breaking up, however, Strom had more time to branch out to new friend groups.
“Looking at the difference between my first semester and second semester, I had more freedom and more time to go and make friends because I wasn’t in my room trying to make a phone call,” Strom said.
Strom’s advice to those who may experience the turkey drop this holiday season is to allow others to comfort you.
“There are people on this campus who really do care,” Strom said. “I talked to my RA, my two closest friends checked in on me, and another guy in my dorm kept making sure I was OK.”
Nelson also shares a piece of sage advice for those who may be going through a similar experience to hers.
“Don’t be afraid to make the changes you think you have to make, even if it feels like it’s going to be really hard,” Nelson said. “You know what’s best for you, and just let yourself do it.”
Cheyenne is a reporter at The Beacon. She can be reached at schoen17@up.edu.
