Christmas shopping for the lazy

By The Beacon | November 19, 2014 5:37pm

By Emera K. Riley |

With finals and Winter Break less than a month away, finding all the perfect gifts for everyone on your list might be a tad difficult. Luckily UP’s Bookstore is just around the corner, and brimming with Pilot swag and everyday essentials that will make holiday shopping a one-stop breeze.

Bill Nye the Science Guy: Ladies Labcoat $26.98 Whether it was listening to Coldplay’s big hit or playing Portal, everyone wanted to be a scientist at least once point in their life. Complete that fantasy with this official science-y labcoat, and start someone on a path to creating a serum that will result in their world supremacy.

The Glass is Half Empty: Gone Girl $15 Gillian Flynn takes readers to dark places in her novel “Gone Girl.” Good for the more pessimistic readers on your list, the shocking ending will have them raving for days and demanding to see the new adaptation on the big screen.

F is For Friends: Measles Plush $9.98 Your best friend back home has a fabulous sense of humor. Make her laugh with this measles plush, without breaking the bank.

For Your Overly Enthusiastic Mom: Festival ¼ Zip Jacket $49.98 The only thing your mom is more proud of than you is her angel figurine collection. Give her something that allows her to insert your name into the conversation with this festive-but-fashionable UP jacket, and try not to wince when she brags about you yet again at your Christmas gathering.

I Speak for the Trees: Chakra Yoga Mat $21.98 Hippies love yoga just as much as they hate deodorant. Scratch your smelly friend off your list by buying them a yoga mat. They’ll be so pleased they’ll do at least three sun salutations in your honor.

Don’t Worry, Be Happy: Nail Art Pen $4.98 Pretty Natural Shower Sponge $4.99 Funky Socks $9.98 Everyone likes to be pampered. Give someone on your list the spa treatment, complete with a delicious smelling and soothing sponge, a fun nail painting session and the funkiest of all socks.

You Can’t Sit with Us: I’d Rather Be Sleeping T-Shirt $29.98 That hipster in your life was probably breathing before it was cool. Give them this ironic t-shirt and try to determine if their weird, cryptic wince was a sign of happiness, intelligent life, or a need to sneeze.

The Kids are Alright: Soccer Ball $20.98 Everyone has a little person in their life younger than the age of 10. Whether they’re your cousin, sibling, or neighbor, you still have no idea what kids play with these days. Take the oldie-but-a-goodie route with this classic gift, and of course, offer them a game as soon as they open it.

You is a Dad: Stretch Hat $21.98 Dads come in all shapes and sizes. Some make dad jokes. Some never turn off the Sports Center. But all dads have one vital thing in common: They wear baseball caps. Complete your dad’s closet by purchasing him his very own UP cap. They come in all colors and sizes, perfect for the father in your life.

Stuff That Sock: Decal Stickers $3.98-5.98 These little stocking stuffers are great for anyone on your list that wants to express their general loyalty to all things UP. Perfect presents for other students or alumni, they easily and inexpensively can cover any surface with glorious purple. Emera L. Riley is a staff writer for The Beacon. You can reach her at