(Ann Truong -- The Beacon)
By
Getting the attention of students can be a difficult task. One place students can't help but pay attention is also the most private of settings: the bathroom. From dorm to dorm comedic and community-driven students have taken up the task of crafting bathroom periodicals for always-attentive readers.
The Bishops Weekly
Villa Maria Hall has The Bishops Weekly, a periodical that goes up in every stall in Villa every Thursday at midnight. The staff of four writers craft a two page publication that includes weekly columns, editorials, guest articles and printed internet humor. Sophomore Kevin Conley was a staff writer last year on the Bishops and now has ascended to the role of editor-in-chief.
"The Bishops is a great device for communicating Villa events, promotes dorm pride, there's techniques about proper pooping, and it's humorous too," Conley said. "It gives you something to do at your most intimate moments."
Villa Maria Hall Director Ben Helms is not only a supporter but also a contributor to the Bishops.
"It's a centerpiece for the activities in Villa," Helms said. "If something's happening it's in the Bishops."
Every week The Bishops keeps score for Sunday Night at the Races (a competitive dorm event), Pilots sports news, which wing will be making beverages at Café Procrastiné, and Villa events like the "Man Auction."
The Corrado Crapper
The Corrado Crapper, a weekly bathroom publication, is written by Corrado's hall council and is focused on community, according to junior Anya Bury. In addition to hall events, the paper has a "Post Secret" section, derived from the worldwide art project in which people write their secrets on post cards and send them to a single location to make a collage.
According to Bury, hall council takes quotes from each wing in Corrado, written anonymously on centrally located poster paper, and combines them in "Post Secret" every week to form a poem.
"The Post Secret serves a role in people getting to know each other," Bury said. "It's a conversation starter in Corrado."
The Kenna Krapper
Sophomore Nico Marquez is editor-in-chief of the Kenna Krapper. He single handedly writes, publishes and distributes the periodical for the enjoyment of his fellow Kennadians. According to Marquez, the Krapper advertises dorm events and puts a smile on his readers' faces by including comics like "Cyanide and Happiness."
"It's meant to be funny," Marquez said. "Kenna is very diverse and like a family so I try and encapsulate that on paper."
One of the ways in which the paper tries to create that family spirit is by accepting submissions from other Kennadians and including residents' birthdays in one of the bi-monthly publications.
"I want people to be say, ‘This is my dorm, what would I like to see in the Krapper,'" Marquez said.
The Mehling Movement
The weekly Mehling Movement can be found on all eight floors of Mehling and includes not only upcoming events, but also a recap of the latest episodes of "Glee" and "Jersey Shore."
"I think it's helpful and keeps you in the know," freshman Katie Christensen said.
On Oct. 3, the Movement recapped Jersey Shore stating: "Jionni was quite rude in this episode, good thing Snooki has Vinnie. Also, really Mike? Are you that desperate for attention that you'd pledge your love for Snooki?"
The Movement does not amuse some residents. "To be honest, I hate it," sophomore Chelsea Davidson said. "I feel like its not very interesting and it supports all the stereotypes about Mehling. I'd rather read The Bishops Weekly."
The Padre Pooper
The Padre Pooper is Schoenfeld's stalwart stall advertiser. Available at the front desk as well as in the bathroom, the paper's main job is advertising events in Schoenfeld and other halls around campus. It also includes interesting facts to contemplate while on the John such as this brain buster from one of last month's issues: "The sink has 100,000 germs per square inch, while the toilet seat only has 100 germs per square inch."
The paper chunks its text and event listings in an interesting way according to fellow periodical producer Nico Marquez. "Out of all the bathroom periodicals, I like the layout of the Padre Pooper best," Marquez said.
The Christie Crapper
Sophomore Jeffrey Phillips is the editor-in-chief of the Christie Crapper, a weekly bathroom reader, which promotes events and includes humorous commentary. Phillips writes many of the "Christie Crapper's" articles.
"I like to focus on people complaining about campus activities and then write about them," Phillips said.
Phillips finds that one of his primary jobs is to remind residents of bathroom etiquette.
"I like to think of myself as the bathroom representative," Phillips said. "I make sure pee goes in the toilet and indicate where to throw up. Freshmen still miss the bowl."
The Shipstad TP
The Shipstad TP is a little bit less consistent than the other bathroom periodicals according to Shipstad sophomore Christian Scarcella, but it serves the purpose of promoting events well in advance.
"It keeps Shipstad residents up to date on activities and it's in a great location," Scarcillia said.
The slogan of the Shipstad TP is worth noting as it sums up the primary purpose of all dorm bathroom periodicals.
"The Shipstad TP, something to look at when the going gets tough," states the Oct. 3 edition.
While inconsistent, The Shipstad TP is in full color, indicating the level of care students in Shipstad take with their publication.
The Healthy Potty Post
The other bathroom periodical that most students see while using the facilities is the Peer Health Educator's Healthy Potty Post, which is written by the nine Peer Health Educators.
"Our goals are to put out information in an interesting way and to advertise for our events," sophomore and PHE Devin Helmgren said. "I think it's an effective thing for PHEs. We're going to try and make the Healthy Potty Post more interactive."
The Healthy Potty Post includes timely tips to stay in good health throughout the year according to Helmgren. For example, the latest issue includes ways to avoid the colds that seem to hit students around weeks five and six of school.
"Secrets to prevention (of colds and flu): Wash your hands! And for the love of all that is holy don't touch your face!" states issue two of the Healthy Potty Post.
In addition to tips, the Healthy Potty Post, always includes the contact information for the University's Health Center, ensuring that students have a link to medical resources if they need them quickly.
Whether readers enjoy catching up on hall events, health tips, funny commentary or printed internet humor, the location of bathroom periodicals puts everyone at an equal likelihood to pick up similar information and, according to Helms, keeps everyone on the same page.
"You may not go to hall council, but you're going to take a crap, so people stay informed," Helms said.
A bathroom reader's guide
Villa Maria Hall's The Bishops Weekly: weekly periodical that goes up on every stall at midnight on Thursday.
The Corrado Crapper: weekly bathroom publication written by Corrado's hall council.
"Kenna Krapper": comical periodical written by sophomore Nico Marquez.
Mehling Movement: weekly publication including upcoming events and recaps of the latest episodes of "Glee" and "Jersey Shore."
Schoenfeld's Padre Pooper: advertisers hall events and includes contemplative facts. Available at the front desk as well as the bathrooms.
Christie Crapper: weekly bathroom reader promoting events and humorous commentary. Written by sophomore Jeffrey Phillips.
The Shipstad TP: an inconsistant, yet still informative, periodical promoting events and activities. Peer Health Educator's Healthy Potty Post: Includes health tips, campus events and information on the Health Center. Avaliable in all dorm bathrooms.
